JEWISH MARRIAGE CUSTOMS: Part Four

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Betrothal (Kiddushin)

Jewish marriages hinged upon two ceremonies: the betrothal (Kiddushin) and the marriage ceremony (Nissu’in). The betrothal [1], is less than a marriage but more than an engagement. The Kiddushin means sanctification or set apart.

When a Jewish couple entered into a betrothal, they considered the marriage to be legal and binding. In fact, when they entered into a betrothal, it was so strong and binding that if the bridegroom died, they considered the woman to be a widow.

The bridegroom brought three things to the house of the prospective bride: a marriage contract (Ketubah), gifts for the bride (Mattan), and the bride price (Mohar).

The father of the bride also gave his daughter a dowry (Shiluhim). When they agreed upon the terms, the groom offered the bride the cup. If she drank from it, this meant that she accepted his proposal. They called this the cup of acceptance. This sealed their marriage.

The groom would then leave and prepare a place for them to live and the bride would prepare herself by taking a ceremonial Mikvah, veil herself until his return, and anticipate his return with fervor. His return is now her only focus.

Parallels to the Church…

Just like the groom left his father's house and traveled to the bride's house for the purpose of betrothal, so did Christ travel from heaven to the earth for the purpose of betrothal and marriage to His prospective bride. The reason behind Christ’s coming was forgiveness from Adam’s sin [2] and to establish a marriage covenant with His bride, the church [3],

The next eight steps happen during the betrothal period: marriage contract, gifts for the Bride, the Father’s dowry, the cup of acceptance, the Bride price, the veil, the preparation of the Bride, and the preparation of the Groom.


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[1] Jeremiah 2:2; Hosea 2:19, 20
[2] 1 John 1:9
[3] Ephesians 1:9-14

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